The Faces of Home Schooling

RED OAK — One ordinary day a few months back, Alan Dean returned home to an unfamiliar smell.

And that smell wasn’t a pleasant one, reeking of ammonia and formaldehyde.  

“I remember … I said ‘what’s that smell?’” Alan recalls. “My wife was dissecting a frog in the ‘school room’ to practice for the next day’s science lesson. I thought, only with home schoolers.”

Dean’s family, which includes his wife Karen and four children, Ashlyn, Tamara, Aidan and Lauren, are one of several in Montgomery County who home school, opting to take none, or some classes at the local public school.

Like most parents, the Deans have several reasons for wanting to home school their children, all with one central theme.

“We just want what’s best for our kids,” Alan said. “And we think this is it.”

Why Home School

Dr. William and Christie Butz home school their three daughters, Laura, 16, a sophomore, Natalie, 13, an eighth grader, and Caitie, 9, a third grader.

All three children have always been home schooled.

“I never thought I would be doing this,” Christie said of home schooling. “We just had a calling I guess. We prayed about it a lot and I had a peace about doing it.”

Like many families, the Butz’s children take some classes at the public school. Natalie is in the middle school band, and takes history, English, and health classes there.

Laura works on math and science at home, if not for any other reason, so she can be challenged more in those subjects and become better prepared for college.

“Sometimes, school systems are doing a different class and you may think your child is ready for the next step, and you can give them that when the school system can’t,” Christie said. “We can slow down or speed up what they need.”

The Deans first saw the need to customize Ashlyn’s education when she was ahead of her kindergarten classmates, simply because of what her mother had taught her at home.

“I knew she wasn’t a gifted genius. I just spent time with her as part of a natural course of being a good parent,” Karen said. “If we keep her there, she is going to be bored. School becomes something she doesn’t like because it is boring.”

Howard and Bonnie Viner started home schooling their four children when their eldest, Lauren, was in fourth grade in 1993. They cited two reasons for pursuing home schooling.

“We wanted to be able to teach them a curriculum that was religiously based. That was one of the most important things,” Bonnie said. “Plus, we wanted to spend time with them. The family time was fantastic.”

The Viners have had three of their four children graduate from college. Lauren earned a double major in four years and went on to earn a masters  in Spanish from Texas Christian University. Nick graduated in three and a half years from the University of Iowa and now works for an investment firm in Los Angeles. Anna just graduated from Chicago’s North Park University in May, and is working for Lifetime Fitness Corporation and the Chicago Bears. Their youngest, Ellen, is studying to be a medical assistant.

“They weren’t perfect kids by any means and we had some very challenging days, but even with those challenging days, I don’t regret it all,” Bonnie said. “If I had to do it again, I absolutely would.”

Home School Stereotypes

Socially inept.
Slackers.
Super smart.
Religious zealots.

Ashlyn knows about the stereotypes of home-schooled students. She said her favorite is homeschoolers are super dumb.

“Even teachers will do that,” she said of assuming home schooled students are behind the curve. “They will ask ‘do you understand’ and I tell them ‘I’m not stupid. I’m just home schooled.’”

Christie has heard the socialization concern most frequently.

“They feel like how does your kid know how to act around other kids,” she said. “I feel like they have no problem whatsoever. They do YMCA activities and church activities. We are in the school. We go to basketball and sports related things. My kids never had a problem and I hope if you see them around, they are well-behaved, and can converse with an adult and their peers.”

Howard believes home-schooled students may actually be more socially advanced than their public school counterparts.

“What we found is that our kids were able to talk to people of all age groups in any situation. We thought their social skills were enhanced rather than negatively impacted,” he said. “People were genuinely concerned, but we didn’t find that to be an issue at all.”

Alan finds the fear that children won’t develop social skills ironic.

“You don’t send your kid to school for socialization. You send them there to get an education,” he said. “And if you had a choice of your child learning manners and morals from other kids their own age or from older siblings and their parents, which would you choose?”

But at the same time, he understands where the stereotypes and beliefs stem.

“If you haven’t experienced it, it is the unknown and there are a lot of questions that go with that,” Alan said.

Curriculum

Home-schooled students have a choice of four different kinds of curriculum, including traditional textbooks, workbooks, computer programs, and unit studies.

During unit studies, students incorporate different subject lessons into the singular topic. The Deans have done unit studies on China, Greece, medieval times, and alternate energy.

As for traditional textbooks and workbooks, the selection has exploded over the last 10 years. Karen has a catalog she calls the WalMart of home school curriculum that’s about six inches thick, filled with different options.

With that many options, material can be selected to suit the individual student’s needs.

For example, Tamara’s math books have no color as she is more easily distracted. Aidan’s on the other hand include more puzzles and graphs as he is more of a visual learner.

Back when they started home schooling in 1993, the choices weren’t as abundant for the Viners. As a result, they selected the nationally-recognized Bob Jones Academy, a Baptist-based curriculum.

“Bob Jones was highly recognized, even by public schools,” Bonnie said. “So when it was time to do high school transcripts for college, it was a lot easier.”

Bonnie supplemented her children’s curriculum by requiring them to read classical literature.

“When they filled out college applications, they submitted a list of books they had read, and the list was pretty extensive,” she said.

Another area that is growing in curriculum use is the computers and the Internet. An estimated 98.3 percent of home-schooled students used a computer as part of their coursework in 2010.

All three families stressed the importance of including Bible study.

“Our faith is an important reason we home school,” said Alan, the pastor at First Covenant Church in Red Oak. “It wasn’t the only one. But it played into the decision. We liked the fact we could place our faith into the curriculum and our children’s education instead of making it a separate thing.”

Families have three options to conform the curriculum to state requirements.

They can go through standardized testing with the public school system, or maintain a portfolio of work demonstrating progress that is reviewed by a supervising teacher. The third option is a quarterly one-on-one review with the supervising teacher.

Christie prefers the supervising teacher review.

“I feel like the supervising teacher gives me a safety net to make sure I’m on the right track,” she said.

Iowa is unusual compared to other states as students can dual enroll at a public school.

“Its not an all or nothing proposition here in Iowa,” Karen said. “If I’m home schooling my kids and there is a class my kid wants to take at the high school, the school will be very receptive to that.”

Christie confirmed Red Oak school officials are very helpful.

“The school system is very accepting of the home schooling people,” she said. “I know the superintendent (Terry Schmidt) and (High School Principal) Jed Sherman. I have had no problems or backlash, and that is something I commend them for, being willing to accept them.”

Schmidt said he supports a family’s right to pursue home schooling and wants to be their education partner rather than adversary.

“Our belief is that parent's have choices and they have every right to decide what is right for their child,” he said. “They are the experts. The parent knows what is best for their child.”

Family Closeness

A recurring theme with the Dean children was one of family closeness.

“I like home schooling because I get along better with my family,” Ashlyn said. “I don’t get annoyed with my siblings as much as public school friends say they do.”

And Karen has seemed to cultivate a relationship with her teenage daughter most parents crave.

“I have a very close relationship with my family and my parents,” Ashlyn said. “I’m constantly talking to my mom about problems I have.”

The Viners experienced the same thing as their children grew up, and now that they are adults scattered throughout the country, they are as close as ever.

“They are really tight. They call each other for support,” Bonnie said. “They really look out for each other. It is really a blessing for us to see how well they get along.”

Karen believes the close relationship is cultivated by the amount of time they inherently spend together.

“As a rule, when home schoolers do things, it’s almost always a family thing,” Karen said. ”When we have something to do, we all go as a family. Home schoolers are very family oriented and have more interactions as a family.”

Even 10-year-old Aidan says playing with his sisters is something he enjoys about the home school schedule.

“I can take a break and go get a snack or go play with my sister for a little while,” he said.

Home School Exchange

While the home school experience has a lot of different elements for families, one common denominator for most of them is the home school exchange.

The part support group/part curriculum supplement brings home-schooled families together from throughout the area twice a month.

Karen estimates there is anywhere from 20-30 families who participate, coming from as far as way as Braddyville, Atlantic, Glenwood, and even north Missouri.

The group meets at Faith Community Church in Red Oak, and it gives the students a chance to socialize with more children while providing the parents a respite.

“Support groups are vital because we all have those days,” Karen said. “It gets tough when I don’t leave the house for days on end. I get irritable.”

With more children, the students have the opportunity to take part in events that would be difficult to duplicate at home, such as science fairs, track and field days and musical productions. Last week, they conducted a communication extravaganza.

The group also goes on field trips and they are planning a campout for the spring.

But it also provides parents a chance to supplement their learning opportunities.

“All the moms have different talents they can lend to each other,” Karen said. “One mother is musical. Another mother is artistic. For me, it is science. Basically, it’s the moms deciding what we would like to have for our kids that we can’t do at home.”

Look Before Leaping
The Viners, Deans and Butzs also share a common belief: Home schooling isn’t for everyone.

“If you aren’t convinced this is the best opportunity for your kids, this isn’t for you,” Karen said. “You must be willing to sacrifice a career, and you need a good relationship with your kids, one that includes discipline.”

Christie said it’s her personal convictions that lead her to believe this is what’s best for her children.

“I don’t think it is right or wrong. It’s not the best thing in the world, just like the public school system isn’t the best thing in the world,” she said. “I keep going back to God has given me a directive. I need to raise these people up for him and do what’s best for our family and raise kids that will continue to work and serve the Lord. I feel like that’s what I’m doing.”

Bonnie, a former public school teacher, agrees.

“Some parents have more patience than others. I know I’ve had moms say they could never home school their kids, and I believe them and I understand why they would say that,” she said. “It was a big undertaking and looking at it from a public school teacher stand point, I was very apprehensive. We prayed about it for a year before we decided to do it.”

As a former school teacher, Karen too struggled with the decision, believing the stereotypes. But for her and her husband, they came back to what was best for their children, which still keeps her going.

“If you aren’t absolutely convinced this is best for your kid, you won’t stick with it,” Karen said.