Pulling off the perfect surprise

It’s kind of hard to pull off a real surprise. I’ve accomplished a few, but I’d say last Thursday’s was my most successful one to date. Paul was totally impressed and Aunt Daisy helped make it happen.

First, let me say a little about Aunt Daisy. Never married, she enjoyed being with family, both her siblings and their families. As a young woman, when two of her brothers entered the military, she arranged to leave her office job to help with farm work so those at home wouldn’t bear the entire burden.

As we nieces and nephews came along, she was one whose generosity put extra presents for us under our grandparents’ Christmas tree.

More importantly though were slides of a trip to Sweden to visit our relatives. They became part of our weekly Sunday afternoon entertainment, as she wanted to strengthen ties across an ocean between people who’d probably never meet.

When we graduated or married or when our children had birthdays, school events, ballgames or parents away for a night, you’d probably find Aunt Daisy helping. She seemed to hope we enjoyed being in her home as much as she was in ours.

Though all of us expected to celebrate many more occasions with Aunt Daisy, she unexpectedly died about a year ago.

With her life having been about her faith and her family, she opted to leave a little money for her nephews and nieces or to their children. I thought it natural to use part of her gift to celebrate family. So I called my kids, without telling Paul.

My son’s wife has just secured a new job, so their traveling for now is out of the question, but my daughter, who hadn’t been to Iowa for nearly three years, said she thought it was a possibility for them. We agreed to work on details without telling Paul.

I can keep confidences. Occasionally, because I’m a pastor’s wife, people have shared things with me that they don’t want others to know, and my lips are sealed. Paul, too, I’m sure, keeps things told to him buried deep.

In our nearly 38 years of marriage, Paul and I have pretty much told each other everything. He’d tell you we generally don’t do a good job of keeping even Christmas presents a secret. We almost always talk over what the other will buy with the $20, or whatever, we’re going to give for the occasion.

How would I keep our daughter’s arrival a secret?

So many times I could have said something, but I caught myself in time. One day Paul lamented, “When are we ever going to see our kids again?”

I thought, “In just a few days, you’ll see our oldest, but I’m not telling you.”

Finally, last Thursday we had a luncheon meeting and I told Paul it’d be best if we both drove, so I could “run some errands” afterward. Thankfully, I’d arranged we would have dinner out with friends that evening. The friends were aware of what was happening. So were a number of our parishioners.

After our meeting, we went our separate ways. Mine included a trip to the airport to pick up our daughter, which went smoothly. She and I congratulated ourselves on our successful secret-keeping.

She had even emailed her dad to tell him she hoped they’d be able to get in touch by telephone later.

About 15 miles west of Red Oak, I called Paul at church. The conversation went something like this:

Me: Hey, Honey, I’m thinking it doesn’t make a lot of sense for me to head over home when it’s so close to dinner time. Do you want to just meet a little early?

Paul: Well, I could finish up a couple things and put the dog out, but it’d be a little while before I could leave, but maybe I could be there a little early. But it’s only 5:25, and we’re to meet at 6” (implying I could come on home).

Me: I’d rather just plan to meet early. I could be there in 10 minutes.

As soon as I said it, I knew I’d said too much.

Paul: Where are you now?

Me: In the car.

Paul: I meant what location.

Me: In the car.

It was very tricky, but I pulled off a surprise that was really touching to him. Though I was successful, there were times I almost felt guilty because I was enjoying the anticipation while Paul wasn’t.

We kept our plans secret by using email.